Dear saleman at King Honda,
Please quit making unsolicited phone calls to my home and cell phone. No, really! I don’t want to trade in my 1994 Acura Legend. That’s why I haven’t answered my phone since the first time you called last year! Just fair warning, next time you call, you will be sorry!

Dear Charter,
We pay you tons of money and we’d appreciate if our cable, internet, and phone would all work!
Thanks much!

Dear me,
Quit being sick! We have too much we need to be doing, don’t you think?

Dear Memorial Day weekend,
I am so happy you made it! You don’t know how happy I am that you’re here. Now just promise me you’ll be relaxing. K? K